You have to feel sorry for Werribee. Not only does it suffer from Boganitis but is also infamous for it’s sewage farm. Yes, 55% of Melbourne’s sewage goes to Werribee. Here’s a joke to start off our shortened week.

HURRICANE APPEAL

A major hurricane (Hurricane Shazza) and an earthquake Measuring 5.8 on theRichter scale hit the Werribee/Sanctuary Lakes area early Friday afternoon with its epicentre near the Geeelong Freeway.

Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly, muttering “Faaackinell”. The hurricane decimated the area causing approximately $30.00 worth of damage. Three areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their centrelink Cheques arrived.

The Leader Newspaper reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered and were still trying to come to terms with it. One resident - Traycey Sharrynn Smith, a 16-year-old mother of 5 said “It was such a shock, my little girl, Chardonnay-Mercedes came running into my bedroom crying. My youngest two, Harley and Kev slept through it all.”

Apparently looting, muggings and car crime were unaffected and carried on as normal.

The Australian Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Bacardi-Breezers to the area to help the stricken locals. Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings, including Health Care Cards, Jewellery and Lap Tops from Officeworks.

HOW CAN YOU HELP?

This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for thoseunfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is most sought after - items most needed include: Baseball caps, Da-da tracksuits, singlets (blue & white), white sport socks, Nike boots, any other items usually sold at Dimmey’s or The Reject Shop.

Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same.Required foodstuffs urgently needed include: Microwave meals, baked beans,Ice cream, Chips, Fizzy drinks. Donations of $15.00 will be taken to buy a packet of Winny blue 25s and alighter to calm the nerves of those affected.

**Breaking news** Werribee Uniting Church has cancelled their local “Nativity Display” due to their inability to find three wise men or a virgin.
Thanks to Strider

When looking for a good image for this post, I found The Werribee Blog. Good for a laugh.